Since Big Rona has been here my days are filled with either shorts or joggers and always a t-shirt. To be completely honest, I have never been an eager to get dressed up person. I actually love joggers, sweat pants, shorts and t-shirts, it has been my happy fashion place. Yet, here I am during the Rona eager to get dressed, even if it is just the grocery store. I find myself putting on jeans to do the simplest of tasks. Although, I love my casual wear, it has been worn out! Since Big Rona has been visiting I have had a couple times when I absolutely needed to get dressed, and as excited as I am to put on a real outfit I wanted to maintain some of my casual relax wear. I had a couple reasons to get dressed; a funeral and work training, despite being specific events…
Being a woman who is Black and gay is nothing like being a woman, being a Black woman, or even simply being Black. Adversity comes with being a woman, being Black, and especially being a Black woman. Unlike Black men, Black women deal with adversity from men of all colors including Black men. Unlike white women, Black women deal with adversity because they are Black. Adding a dash of gay in the mix changes the game because not only do you deal with adversity for being Black and a woman, now you deal with adversity from Black women simply because you like the same sex. Do we need to make a list? Adversity can come from some or all of these places; non-Black men, non-Black women, black men, and straight Black women. Although there is a lot of adversity to talk about, let’s focus on the most important. As Black…
The Me Too movement has opened up the conversation about sexual harassment, rape and rape culture. For centuries, women have been taken advantage of by men, but there is a group we never discuss and their contribution to rape culture and sexual harassment. Oftentimes, women forget that they too can be predatory and not solely the victim. As a lesbian, straight women have been predatory to me and I’ve witnessed them do it to other lesbians. My friend Mimi said, “They always become predators once they hear I am gay, from the touching to the rubbing and it’s always I’ve never kissed a girl before, they think it’s okay because they are also women but the shit is mighty uncomfortable. I’ve had women literally kiss me without my permission because it’s what girls do.” Straight women believe that it is harmless to push their fantasies on lesbian women but it…
This is a good look for work and easy to pull off. If you buy men’s pants and jackets whether you are male or female, I recommend finding a good cheap tailor. If your city has a K&G they always keep a good tailor on hand who is reasonable. INC Men’s Slim-Fit Glen Plaid Pants Everyday Crew-Neck Sweater for Men Men’s Slim Fit Essential Oxford Dress Shirt Oxblood The Rome Boot INC Stretch Slim-Fit Blazer
Typically, in work environments most masculine presenting or men opt for the easy go to polo’s, button downs and pants but don’t forget to show your personality with colors. I often wear dope socks with cool prints, colors and styles but you can make your clothes pop by wearing bold and daring colors. I will have a post soon about colors that I will link here. The style I wore on this day was simple but bold. INC Men’s Jack 2.0 Slim-Fit Pants Tommy Hilfigure Slim Fit Dress Shirt Navy and Green Scarf Khaki Anorak Reveal Hooded Jacket Steve Madden Ousted Oxford
So many things affect finding a style that looks right on you. Honey, let me tell you, this has always been a struggle for me. I’ve always wanted to have a certain look yet, never could figure out how to pull it off. What I learned is that my struggle was bigger than what I wanted but was more about how I felt. I’m not insecure but I’m fasho self conscious. Being a Black woman who is a masculine presenting lesbian (stud *inserts eye roll), I constantly thought about how something looks on me, would this look good, or even how would people perceive me. I work in an environment that is easily 95% (and I’m being generous) white and in the south, if not this job, any other environment here. I often wondered if what I wear is too masculine would people feel a way about how I look.…
